Secret Writer
by musicismylife575
Summary: I'm gonna start off by telling you something about myself that most people don't know... I have a secret habit... Im actually a writer.  Shounen-ai, MattxMello, Slight AU, Set at Whammy's, Matt POV
1. Chapter 1

_Hey y'all! So idk if anyone is actually going to read the authors note, but I'm writing it anyways so ha. Anyways, this is my first fanfic, so be nice, but constructive criticism is indeed appreciated.  
_

General Story Info: This is going to be kind of AU, because Kira and Deathnote stuff is not mentioned (probably), but set at Whammy's Orphanage. Matt and Mello are both 16. Matt POV, possibly Mello's in later chapters

Disclaimer: I do not own these characters, or death note. Sigh…

Warnings: Shounen-ai. MattxMello. Don't like, don't read. I DON'T write lemons, so don't ask, and the rating is not going above T(and that's just for the swearing). Possibly spoilers for real names, but not in this chapter.

Enjoy :)

I'm gonna start off by telling you something about myself that most people don't know. You know, just to break the ice, or some shit like that. I have a secret habit. In between video game marathons, classes that I actually choose to attend, and listening to my hot, leather toting, chocolate eating, best friend and nothing more, (insert internal sigh here) Mello rant about the latest thing which Near has beat him at, I am actually a writer.

I know what you're thinking; what, bad ass Matt spends his time writing sentimental shit? Ok at least that's what I wish you were thinking, and if you weren't I will sick a chocolate deprived Mello on you. But yes, that is indeed what I do, and I'll be damned if I'm not pretty decent at it. Still, I had always kept it a secret, even from Mello, mostly because I was positive he would never let me live it down if he knew that some of the writing, all right MOST of my writing, was about him. I can't help it, he's such a good subject, and I find myself thinking up lines just by watching him stare absently out the window, which happens a lot, since we share a room. Yeah, I watch him. I'm a creeper like that. Got a problem?

So, every night, after I was sure he was asleep, or at least so focused on his studying he wouldn't notice the absence of noise from our television that usually accompanies my late night gaming, I would sneak my leather-bound notebook out of its ingenious hiding place (the vent above my bed) and write. After a while, the accumulating notebooks began to take up space, so when I got my laptop (a gift from L, I baked him cakes for a month afterwards I was so thankful) I transferred all of my writing to a secret file that no amount of hacking could possible get anyone but me into. I'm just that awesome. Just try to break those damn encriptions. I didn't think so. Naturally, I thought my secret was safe. Until last night.

_Soooo yeah, feed back will be greatly appreciated, review even if all you have to say is "meh, that was ok". I'll let you know soon if I decide to stick with it and post more chapters._


	2. Chapter 2

AN: This speed of updating is probably only a one-time occurrence, I was stuck in bed with a bad cold today… but writing makes me feel better :) you know what would also make me feel better? Reviews! :D

Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note, its characters, or Pac-man. Though wouldn't that be nice…

Warning: Shounen-ai. MattxMello. Don't like, don't read. I DON'T write lemons, so don't ask, and the rating is not going above T (and that's just for swearing). Possibly spoilers for real names in future chapters

For those of you who don't know much about me, there is something very important you must understand. I'm a gamer, and not just a plays-so-much-he-forgets-his-homework gamer, or even a no-one-ever-sees-him-sleep gamer. No, at this point, the only thing you could use to describe the extent of time I spend staring at some screen or another and the ridiculous ability I seem to have to break record scores in a matter of minutes is, well… Matt. That's just me. Oh, and I'm pretty much the best hacker in the world. I figured that once you've gotten far enough into the secret intelligence's mainstream to know what seasoning the president ate on his linguini and that their main tech guy is deathly allergic to peanut oil, you are worthy of the title. And that just happened on the one day that Roger took away my games. Needless to say, he soon learned it was better for everyone involved, not to mention humanity in general, not to let me get bored. He's a slow learner though; it wasn't till about noon, after I had already hacked all of the satellites orbiting earth to make a collision course that I had intended to manipulate in a manner similar to a space age version of Pac-man that he decided my deprivation had gone on long enough. And that was only because the first cherry was over his beach house in Florida. Selfish ass.

Aaaand I'm getting off topic here. What I was getting at is that I spend all my time loving those beautiful little devices, and very little of my time attending the classes offered here. Which is why it was a rare occurrence for me to glance up from my laptop at my buzzing phone and flip out completely, shouting obscenities while simultaneously trying to shove myself into my backpack and my laptop into my clothes, before I realized I had it backward and starting over. I had set my phone alarm so that I wouldn't forget, and I hadn't really, I had just pressed the snooze button… a few too many times. Normally, I couldn't have been bothered to worry myself about being late to a class, even if it was one of my favorites; a class on advanced computer engineering. But today was special. Today, I had to leave a good impression, because today there was a guest speaker. Although this in of itself was a rare occurrence, as Whammy's Orphanage for Gifted Youth was pretty much closed off completely from the outside world, that wasn't why I was so excited. This guest speaker also happened to be one of my idols, since I got my first taste of technology at the tender young age of… actually, you know what I'm not going to even pretend to know when my addiction started, I was practically weaned on the stuff. This guest speaker, this secretive detective, is known only to the world as "L."

Simply put, L is a genius, a genius among geniuses, in fact quite possibly the smartest person alive. Most importantly, he is the only person to know more about technology than me. The only reason I am the best hacker and gamer alive, and not him, is because he has never really tried. L puts all of his genius into solving cases and bringing justice to the world around him. A valiant effort on his part, but his path is not for me. Even though I am considered the third smartest at this orphanage of mini-L's, I have no interest in following his footsteps. After all, that would mean surpassing Mello, who is ranked second, and after seeing how he treats Near, who is ranked first, I _definitely_ don't want to be his rival. I like my position as best friend, thank you very much. Well actually, I could think of a couple things better than that… but that would involve willingness on both parties. Something I know better than to hope for.

Anyways, somehow in the process of getting my limbs in the right holes, (seriously, when did clothing become so freaking complicated?) I forgot to put my laptop in my bag, and ran out of the room with all the grace of a bull rhino, leaving my laptop lying innocently on my bed, quietly humming and emitting a low flash of light every few seconds, indicating that it was simply biding its time until my return, and was in no means as "off" as it should have been.

Which brings me to my current predicament.

About half way to the auditorium, I happened to check my phone to see just how phenomenally late I was going to be only to realize I had set my alarm about 5 hours too early. Sighing with an odd mix of frustration and relief, I halted my crazy dash through the completely empty halls, which was not surprising as it was about 3 am actually, and began the walk back to my dorm room, adjusting my goggles onto my eyes from where they had been swinging haphazardly around my neck during my earlier rush. After giving myself a quick once over and realizing I had put my vest on inside out (no wonder it had been so itchy!), I swung my backpack around to my front and reached into the back cushioned pocket to make sure my laptop hadn't been smashed, and stopped in shock. It was gone. Left alone. In my room. With Mello. Had I even shut it off…?

With that last reassuring thought, I resumed my running, in reverse this time, leaving my backpack thrown against a wall somewhere behind me as it would weigh me down, and I could always come get it later. There was much more at stake this time. If Mello found out… I began to run faster than I think I have ever run in my entire life.


	3. Chapter 3

A.N. I… had a complete change of heart when writing this today. I had originally planned to make Mello discover his writing in this chapter, and have it end pretty soon after, but as I was writing, I realized I wasn't quite ready for it to be over yet. So, there will be a plot change as of this chapter, and an introduction of another character! I hope it goes over well with you all ^w^

Ever since the dorms had been remodeled last year, getting anywhere through that maze of a building was extremely complicated, and new students were often found wandering the halls completely lost after hours of trying to navigate the maze like lay out. It seemed completely unnecessary and more than a little frustrating, and it had always made him wonder who had designed the building. Even though I had been living in them for almost a year now, the way back to our room was still much longer than it should have been. The hallways seemed to stretch on for eternity, and all I could think of while running at breakneck speed was that for the first time in my life I regretted skipping all my PE and sports classes; its not like I was in bad shape, far from it actually, but my legs didn't seem to be able to move at the super human speed I wanted them too at the moment. If only there was one of those red Mario mushrooms lying around for me to run into, like in Mario Kart, that would be so useful right now… strange the places your mind goes in times of stress, huh?

After what seemed like an eternity, I rounded the final corner on the way to my destination. More than a little winded from all that running, I burst through the door, and halted, completely shocked. My laptop was still sitting on my bed, but it was no longer sitting alone. In fact, it was no longer closed. It was very open. I suddenly felt very vulnerable, as I slowly raised my eyes from my laptop to see the face its light was illuminating in the dark room. My wide, horrified eyes were met with dark obsidian ones, staring blankly at my disheveled appearance.

Oh my Luigi… a complete stranger was so close to knowing my secret… I was suddenly very glad I had thought to put in an emergency protection system for situations in which I didn't have time to rebury my files; this one went on automatically if I closed my computer without shutting it off.

After I got over the initial shock of how close my whole secret life had come to being bared before my eyes, I realized some very important things that I probably should have noticed right off the bat. One, Mello was still safely asleep in his bed. Ok, that's a good thing. Big relief on my part. I silently thanked the great flying spaghetti monster in the sky that he was such a sound sleeper. Seriously, I could have driven a horde of elephants through the room, and he wouldn't have noticed a thing. Moving on.

Two. There was a very strange man that most definitely should NOT have been in our room, perching oddly on his toes on MY bed, looking at ME like I was out of place! For a moment, I was simply curious as to just _how_ exactly he had gotten into our room, or even into the orphanage to begin with; our security systems are top notch here, as a house full of geniuses training to be the latest and greatest in… well, pretty much everything just begs for assassins to regularly attempt to get rid of us - not that any have ever actually succeeded. That though was quickly followed up with suspicion and anger at this creepy looking guy for invading my privacy, was about to tell him as much, when he raised a single pale finger gently to his lips, and gestured with his head to the sleeping blond in the bed across from him. He then lightly patted the area next to him, indicating that I should sit down to talk to him quietly, then gingerly raised his hand back to his mouth, and bit lightly on the pad of his thumb, resting it on his slightly parted lips.

I was completely flabbergasted, and more than a little bit curious now. Just who was this man…? He didn't seem like the common criminal type, and he had shown no signs of wishing harm on either one of us. Approaching the bed with caution, I carefully took in his appearance. He crouched in an odd style, putting all his weight on the balls of his feet, back curved over in a posture that would make a chiropractor weep. He carried huge bags under each eye, as if he hadn't slept a day in his life, and his eyes themselves were the deep black pools, and devoid of expression, save perhaps a mild curiosity. His midnight black hair looked like it had never seen a comb and stuck out every which way about his head. All of that black contrasted sharply with extremely pale skin, seeming almost translucent in the light emitted by the computer screen. He sported a pair of loose fitting jeans and a loose white long sleeved shirt that fell oddly on his thin frame.

Reaching the side of the bed I sat down slowly, and stared back into those huge, dark orbs, a look of utter confusion on my face.

"Who are you, and how exactly did you get here…?" I whispered.

"Do not worry, I came here because I was invited by Quillish Whammy. You may call me Ryuuzaki." He spoke in a low monotone, as if the whole situation simply bored him.

"You were invited to our room?" I said somewhat sarcastically, raising an eyebrow.

"Ah, no actually," At this, Ryuuzaki, if that's what his name really was, seemed almost sheepish, although it was so subtle I barely noticed it.

"I was exploring the new dorms and became lost… the door to your room was left open, so I entered in hope of finding some help. However, your roommate here was sound asleep, and I didn't feel much like waking him."

At the mention of Mello, I suddenly remembered why I had been angry before. "So you decided to pass the time by invading my privacy?"

He didn't seem to feel guilty at all; in fact, he seemed almost amused by my frustration. However, seeing that I was getting angrier by the second (you could almost see one of those little anger marks that they have in anime on my forehead at that point), he decided to amend.

"Ah so this is yours…? At first I had just intended to use it to contact someone who might be of assistance to me, but I was intrigued as to what would need to be so hidden that it would require so many layers of protection. I don't see why you felt the need to hide it however; you really are a fantastic writer."

My eyes must have bulged halfway out of my head at this point. My mouth fell open comically as I sputtered and flailed and was at a complete loss for words. How had he managed to get past my barriers? When I set them up I had been completely focused and I was sure I had covered any possible gaps; I wouldn't have made a mistake in something so important! To do it, he would have to be an even better hacker than me, but that's not possible—wait…

"Ryuuzaki… why did you say you were invited here again?"

"I didn't say actually…" He looked slightly suspicious at this point, probably wondering what on earth had prompted that question.

"You weren't here to give a lecture by any chance, were you…?"

The man just stared at me and blinked several times. After a few seconds, he decided it was safe to respond with a slow "Yes actually, I was-"

I interrupted him by jumping up off the bed and bouncing up and down excitedly. Now it was his turn to be confused.

"NO WAY, I just KNEW it was you, I mean who else would have been able to break through my safety walls, and have permission to wander through the dorms at night, and oh my Luigi I can't even believe I'm finally meeting you, you've been my hero since forever-"

As I rambled on, realization seemed to dawn on his face, and a slight smile appeared on the corners of his lips. He seemed almost proud at my discovery.

"I geuss you caught me. Yes, I am indeed the detective known as L. Now I would appreciate it if you would stop making so much noise, I would like to remain under the radar for the time being."


	4. Chapter 4

AN: OH my goodness, it's been much too long since I've updated… writers block + quarter finals is NOT a good combination… Plus I've kind of been going through a personal crisis: if you want to know, you are free to ask, I kinda need someone to talk to… *A* But these excuses are still excuses… Gomen! *apology cookies for all* I hope you like this chapter anyways! An extra cookie for anyone who can guess who L is talking about ^w^

General Story Info: This is going to be kind of AU, because I wanted them both to be older, but set at Whammy's Orphanage. And Death Note and Kira will most likely not be mentioned. Matt and Mello are both 16. Matt POV, possibly Mello's in later chapters (Next chapter!)

Disclaimer: I do not own these characters, or death note. Or my life apparently… damn homework XP

Warnings: Shounen-ai. MattxMello. Don't like, don't read. I DON'T write lemons, so don't ask, and the rating is not going above T (and that's just for swearing). Possibly spoilers for real names, but not in this chapter.

"NO WAY, I just KNEW it was you, I mean who else would have been able to break through my safety walls, and have permission to wander through the dorms at night, and oh my Luigi I can't even believe I'm finally meeting you, you've been my hero since forever-"

As I rambled on, realization seemed to dawn on his face, and a slight smile appeared on the corners of his lips. He seemed almost proud at my discovery.

"I geuss you caught me. Yes, I am indeed the detective known as L. Now I would appreciate it if you would stop making so much noise, I would like to remain under the radar for the time being."

"Oh, yeah, sure, no problem." I said in a much quieter tone than the one I had been using before. I wasn't worried about waking Mello, but the rest of the dorm probably wouldn't appreciate being woken up at approximately 3am on a Friday.

"So…. Ah… what all did you read?" I asked pretty nervously; depending on what he had read, it was possible he already knew how I felt about Mello… I could only hope he approved.

"Not much actually, I only had a few minutes to read before you walked in, and there is quite a lot of writing here… if you plan on continuing this, I will probably need to get you another laptop with more storage space, or at least another place to store your older files. Would you ever consider publishing some of this? Its quite good."

"N-NOOO!" I blurted out hastily, then remembered I was supposed to be being quiet, and half-whispered, "There's no way I could, not until…"

After a moment, L nodded sagely. "I understand; you need time to inform him of your feelings. Am I correct in assuming that this is Mello…?" he gestured toward the bed where he was still sleeping peacefully.

My face had turned nearly as red as my hair by that point, and could only nod shyly. So he did know… but he didn't seem to have a problem with it, so… ah screw it, he's the only person who knows, and I NEED to get this stuff off my chest.

"ah, L, um… if you aren't too busy wandering the halls and what not, would you mind hanging around here for a bit…?" I nervously adjusted my goggles, looking at the sole keeper of my biggest secret with the best puppy dog look I could muster.

L chuckled lightly and nodded once, and indicated that I should sit down again by patting the blankets next to him.

"So, judging by the amount of literature you have compiled, is it safe to assume you have felt this way for quite sometime?"

"I realized what it was I was feeling on Halloween three years ago…" I sank down slowly onto the bed, interlocking my fingers as I did so.

The sound of shifting blankets coming from Mello's bed caused me to jump a little, and I held my breath for a few seconds before determining he was probably just moving in his sleep, and sighed heavily. If he had been awake… I didn't even want to think about it.

L just looked at me expectantly, waiting for me to elaborate.

I sighed a little, thinking back on it. "I ran around half the night getting all the chocolate I could lay my hands on just because I knew it would make him happy, and to cheer him up because Near had beat him again in that weeks rankings." I chuckled lightly. "When I gave it to him, he tore into it just like I knew he would with a smile on his face like a three year old on Christmas morning. I was blushing before I realized what was happening, seeing him with that adorable look in his eyes… It wasn't until afterwards when I was questioning the reasons behind that blush that I realized that thought of him and adorable in the same context way too often than is considered normal for best friend status… it was kind of a shock, as I hadn't really thought of myself as being, ah… well-"

"Homosexual?" L added helpfully, sensing my struggling.

My blush, which had subsided somewhat, intensified tenfold. "N-not that so much as, um, just, well, being anything-sexual. I had never been attracted to anyone else, so I had kind of assumed I was asexual…"

At this, L looked at his feet, hugging his knees to his chest and wiggling his toes slightly, and mumbled something that sounded suspiciously like "That is what I had thought about myself as well…"

"L…?" I questioned, not wanting to push him away, but at the same time curious about the implications behind his statement.

"… May I confide in Matt as well?" L asked quietly, looking back in my direction with an unreadable expression.

"O-of course!" I said, trying to seem welcome without showing my curiosity.

L sat there silently, staring at his toes for a while, and I was beginning to think he wouldn't continue, when he spoke again, even more softly than before.

"Recently, I have become closer to… someone… than I have ever thought possible, and against my better judgment, I have come to consider him my first ever friend. As I continued to spend increasing amounts of time with this person, I began to recognize feelings that I had never previously harbored welling within me, feelings like jealousy, undeserved forgiveness, and, eventually… love. However, it would be unwise to pursue a relationship, as it would be a serious danger to me, and perhaps to him as well… not to mention…" Here he paused, a light blush surprisingly dusting his pale cheeks. "I highly doubt he returns my feelings…"

"Hah… I guess we are in the same boat then, hm?" I smiled at him, and he returned it with one so slight I wasn't even sure if it was there. He looked at me almost sadly.

"But, you see, it isn't really the same at all… you and Mello have a chance at making this work, as a relationship would hardly be life threatening for either of you. If you think there is any chance that he returns your feelings, I suggest you act on it."

"I suppose you are right… thank you for the advice."

"I thank you as well Matt, for being an open ear. You are the only person I have confided these feelings in."

"Ah, same here…"

"Well I suppose I should attempt once again to reach my destination. You wouldn't by any chance be able to direct me towards the kitchens? I am badly in need of some cake…"

Although a bit confused by his odd request, I sent him in the right direction. As I closed the door behind him, I yawned heavily, and realized I was a bit tired out from all that running and the emotional stress. Changing back into my bedclothes and crawling underneath my striped covers, I hoped I would be seeing L again soon. It was nice to have someone to talk to about, well, the things I couldn't talk to Mello about. I shut off my laptop and stored it away, making sure to double check my security to make sure L hadn't torn any holes in it. He hadn't, not that I had really expected him too, but it never hurts to be careful… or ridiculously paranoid…. Ha ha…

I sighed, turning to face the wall in an attempt to clear my mind of Mello-related thoughts and get some sleep before the lecture tomorrow. Just before I slipped into dreamland however, I thought I heard the sounds of someone shuffling across the room towards my bed, and I could have sworn I heard someone whispering my name affectionately, and the faint smell of chocolate… _damn my imagination for being so vivid…_ Was my last thought, before I drifted off into a Mello-filled sleep.

Thank you for reading! Oh, and next chapter will be from Mello's point of view, I am surprised I have gone this far without him… XP I will try to update much sooner this time!


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